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Showing posts with label Life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Life. Show all posts

The Autograph I Never Asked For

Back in the mid-90s, I was stood on a train platform in Leeds waiting for a train down to London for a meeting, when I suddenly spotted :contentReference[oaicite:0]{index=0}. As a massive football fan and lifelong Manchester United supporter, it genuinely stopped me in my tracks. To this day, I still think he was the greatest player ever to play in England. Effortless, unpredictable, flawed, brilliant... football’s first real rock star.

I desperately wanted to go over and ask for an autograph, but he was with a young woman and I convinced myself I shouldn’t interrupt him. It felt like his private time, and I didn’t want to become another overexcited fan shoving a scrap of paper under his nose. So I stayed quiet, watched him from a distance for a few moments, then got on my train.

And honestly... I still regret it.

Since then, I’ve gone out of my way to speak to people I admire when the opportunity appears. Not in an intrusive way, but just enough to say hello, shake a hand, or share a quick word. Life moves far too quickly to spend it worrying about looking daft for thirty seconds. Sometimes the moments you don’t take stay with you far longer than the ones you do.

In fact, writing this has reminded me to finally reach out and contact Dick Van Dyke. Funny how old regrets can still give you a little push years later.

I'm sad about dying

I don't think I'm afraid of dying.

My personal belief system tells me that life doesn't simply end, and I believe I'll be reborn in some form, somewhere.

But I do sometimes feel sad at the thought of my final days.

I honestly believe that I'll know the very last time I see the people I love; my beautiful wife and my amazing daughters. When my mind wanders in that direction, I find it very sad and painful. Even just writing this brings a ruddy tear to my eye!

I think, particularly as a parent, these thoughts hit harder than the very thought of death itself.

Not because I'll be gone. Not because I know they'll carry on without me. Simply because I'll know that I'll never see them again.

I think it's strange that I can make peace with my own ending far more easily than I can make peace with leaving the people I love behind.

I am always hopeful that:

1. I am a long way from my final days.

2. I'll learn to come to terms with the end, and not find it quite as sad as I do now.

The Father Figure I Didn't Realise I Had

My grandad was Norman Griffiths.

I can't tell you how much I loved my maternal grandad. Even in my early twenties, I used to say that I couldn't wait to become a grandad myself one day.

I lost Grandad in 1994 when I was 27. He was only 72.

Thankfully, one of my daughters gave me my first grandchild, Freddie, in 2025, so I finally got my chance.

The reason I'm writing this is because I've just had a bit of a realisation.

My dad left when I was 11. Looking back, I think Grandad quietly became my father figure after that. I don't think I'd ever consciously thought about it before, but it explains a lot about why I adored him so much.

When I was growing up, he could be a pain and brilliant in equal measure.

There were the ruddy chin pinches and the times he'd trap me between his legs so I couldn't escape. As a child, that was endlessly annoying. Looking back now, I'd probably give anything to experience it one more time.

We weren't a wealthy family, but my grandparents always seemed to find a way. They bought some of our best Christmas presents, and I'm fairly sure they helped pay for our annual holidays to Great Yarmouth.

More importantly, Grandad taught me things that had nothing to do with money. He helped shape the person I became. The older I get, the more I realise how much of my outlook, values, and approach to life came from him.

It's funny how some things take decades to understand.

I always knew I loved my grandad.

What I've only just realised is that, after my dad left, he became the man I looked up to most.

Love you, Grandad.

My Wedding Speech

As a Digital Garden is designed to help catch and record all of those things that would otherwise go missing, I have copied my wedding speech below from our wedding on Saturday, 31 December 2022 .

If you ever read this, just know that I was going for warm, funny, emotional, a little scruffy around the edges in a good way, and very much just like me.

“Ladies and gentlemen, my wife and I...” (wait for cheering and applause) “...would like to thank you all for being here today. Some of you had tough journeys to get here, and we really appreciate it.

I’ve married Mrs Right. I just didn’t realise her first name was Always!

On any day this would be an amazing day, but after a tough couple of years for everyone, for different reasons, today feels extra special.

I’m going to talk about Debs in a few moments, but first we have some thank yous to get through.

Firstly, we are truly blessed to have all of you with us today.

Debs’ mum, Jacqui, you have been a rock for both of us. You helped make Debs who she is today, and you welcomed me from day one. Thank you.

Matron of Honour, Babs, and Bridesmaid, Kat, thank you for taking care of Debs in the run-up to the wedding and for being by her side today. Your support is appreciated by both of us.

My best people... two of the most amazing daughters anyone could ask for, both of whom periodically checked in with me over the last couple of months to make sure everything was on track. Thank you for the wild stag do in Scarborough, one of the best weekends of my life. I think it must be one of the only stag dos ever that also managed to get a load of washing and drying done!

HAND OUT GIFTS

There are some people who can’t be with us today, and it’s fair to say we wouldn’t be the people we are without them. They will always be with us ... my mum, my grandparents, and Debs’ grandparents. Please raise a glass.

Thanks to everyone who had anything to do with making sure this wedding went off without a hitch. Etsy, Amazon, and Jimmy Choo. Seriously though, thank you to everyone involved, including Connor, Rachel, and the hotel staff, who have been superb. Lost a point there, Connor, for not being available when I locked myself out of the hotel early this morning! ... but more importantly, thanks to the very understanding bank manager.

And finally, with no offence to anyone else in the room ... they’re gorgeous, funny, light up any room, and are a bit of a snazzy dresser. George couldn’t stop complimenting me earlier, and I know he won’t be happy that I’ve told everyone that!

Seriously though ... Debs, I couldn’t ask for a better friend, partner, soulmate, or wife.

You are such a kind and supportive soul.

I was so looking forward to seeing you walk down the aisle today, and you looked amazing. You took my breath away ... but you do that every single day.

We spend our days laughing together and sharing silly moments. Oh, the laughing ... some jokes better than others. Singing ... some tunes better than others. We say we love each other countless times every day. We are inseparable. We hold hands everywhere ... when we’re out, on the sofa, or just shopping ... and there is always love between us. There always will be.

My heart is full of love for you, and I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you.

You mean the world to me, and I can’t wait to spend the rest of our lives together and fall deeper in love with you every single day.

To Debs. *toast*

I HATE My Handwriting

I really do hate my handwriting.

I often look back at things I’ve written and I can’t make heads or tails of them. It’s my own writing, from my own hand, and even I sit there trying to decode it like I’ve found an ancient scroll in a drawer with ruddy hieroglyphs all over it .

I blame my old school. I’m of an age where we had to write with fountain pens. Not only that, but we had to go through our Penmanship grades. I did get my Grade 1 Penmanship, by the way, so at some point in history I was officially good at this.

The problem was that we also had to write in italics. So today, my handwriting has these very angular and slanty, and ittends to be an extreme slant. It looks like the words are trying to leave the page before I’ve finished writing them.

Apparently, according to handwriting experts, this sort of slant can suggest someone is impulsive and has a penchant for oversharing ... which is probably fair.

I also apparently have a large “upper zone”. That means the taller parts of my letters usually go higher than they should. This is meant to suggest someone who thinks a lot, has creative hobbies, and has big future aspirations or goals.  I mean, I do write beer reviews and make videos, so I’ll take that bit.

Less kindly, big upper zones are also linked with being slightly disconnected from reality, with a bit of a head-in-the-clouds mentality.  Cheek.

The truth is, my handwriting just isn’t attractive. It never looks relaxed. It never looks casual. It looks like it has been trained too hard and has never quite recovered.

And when I try to fight against that old style of writing, which I do quite a lot, it ends up looking even worse. The original shape is still there underneath, but now it’s annoyed.

So I’m stuck with handwriting that I don’t like, can’t easily change, and can barely read.

Still, at least I’ve got the Grade 1 Penmanship certificate floating around somewhere ... so winner 😀

Little Wins

I don't know if your like me, but I can spend far too much time worrying about big things; so I decided to keep a list of all my Little Wins ... small moments that made me smile, laugh, lifted my mood, restored a tiny bit of faith in humanity, or just left me quietly satisfied for reasons that probably make no sense to anyone else.

Not life-changing moments. Just tiny victories. The sort of things that barely matter in the grand scheme of things, but somehow still improve your day.


Monday 25th May 2026

Our grandson Freddie was 1 year old today, and we had a party for him at my daughter's house. As an added bonus, my other daughter was there too.

What a gorgeous little boy he is. The sun was shining, we were all sat in the back garden, and Freddie was on great form. It can sometimes take him a minute or two to realise that everyone around him is a friendly face, but once he settles in, he's such a joy to be around.

A couple of moments really stood out for me. First, his Nana Deb came out of the house and he was more than happy to be carried and cuddled by her for ages. Second, I was wearing a summer straw cowboy hat and he became fascinated by it.

At first, he loved taking it off my head and dropping it on the floor with howls of laughter. Later, with a little help from Grandy, he started taking it off my head and putting it back on again. He had the most gorgeous laugh as he did it.

It was an absolute joy to spend time with the little fella on his very first birthday.

Friday 22nd May 2026

It feels like it's been a long week today, but with Bank Holiday Monday, it's only actually been four days!

In many ways, it's been a pretty challenging week at work. We've had our share of issues across Sales and Marketing, and at times it felt like things could easily have gone off the rails.

I can't go into the details because it's commercially sensitive, but what I can say is that I'm genuinely proud of the work I've done this week. The communications plan and content I put together helped turn what could have been a very difficult situation into something much more manageable.

Anyone that does a similar role to me will know that marketing doesn't always get the credit when things go right, and that's fine. Sometimes the satisfaction comes from knowing you've done your job well, even if most people never see the work that went into it.

So, despite the frustrations and challenges, I'm leaving work tonight feeling pretty chuffed with myself ... and walking a little taller because of it.

Monday 25th May 2026

OMG, what an absolutely brilliant day today.

It’s been a glorious Bank Holiday weekend, with temperatures in our back garden hitting 42°C. We’ve mostly just lounged around doing very little, enjoying the sunshine and spending time together.

But today was extra special, because today was Freddie’s first birthday.

As well as seeing both of my daughters, Freddie himself was an absolute joy. We don’t get to see him often because they live so far away. We catch up on FaceTime, but it’s never quite the same.

Today though, he smiled and laughed the entire time we were with him.

At one point, he found it hilarious to take my summer straw cowboy-style hat off my head and throw it on the floor, only for me to pick it back up and put it on again so he could repeat the whole process. Later on, while I was holding him, he was crying with laughter as he took my hat off and carefully placed it back onto his Grandy’s head.

He also had the longest cuddle with his Nana.

He’s such a loved little boy, and today was just amazing.

Friday 8th May 2026

We were staying at the H10 Salou Princess in Salou, Spain, and had rented one of the hotel’s Balinese beds for €25. After we’d settled in, someone wandered over and decided to sunbathe on the bed next to ours without paying for it.

Now, a lot of people probably wouldn’t care. But I did.

So I wandered down to reception and quietly mentioned it. A few minutes later, a member of staff came up and asked them if they wanted to rent the bed properly. They suddenly lost interest, gathered their things, and moved on.

And honestly... I was absurdly satisfied.

Not because anyone got told off. Not because I wanted an argument. Just because, for once, the world briefly worked exactly as it should.

Monday 27th April 2026

At ProSolve, we tend to take our time when refreshing the brochure. As it changes every 12 months, we can have hundreds of new products to add, along with countless amendments.

So when our Sales Director challenged me to get one completed, printed, and ready within two weeks, with 165 new products to add and endless changes to make, it felt like a massive ask.

But I said “yes”.  And today, 14 days later, I did it.  Very chuffed ... and just in time for an event too.

I Thought Facts Would Matter More

I noticed something during my brief spell as a paper candidate for the Liberal Democrats recently, and that is that people don't just hold opinions anymore ... they hold beliefs. Deep ones.

And once those beliefs settle in, facts barely seem to matter, in fact I don't think they do matter.

During the May 2026 local elections I spoke to several people who wanted to vote for Reform UK because they wanted someone who would “stop the boats”. The strange part was that even when you pointed out that local councillors have absolutely no control over immigration policy or border enforcement, it often made no difference at all.

The belief had already locked into place and cannot (always) be rocked.

I saw the same thing online. A Facebook friend confidently posted that “there’s only one party not funded in any way by Israel, and that’s the Greens.”

The problem is that this is simply untrue.

As I pointed out, under UK law, political parties cannot accept funding from foreign governments or foreign states anyway. It’s illegal under the Political Parties, Elections and Referendums Act 2000.

When I asked for evidence that the Liberal Democrats were receiving money from the State of Israel, there was a change of goalposts, this time they pointed out that response was that the party has a “Liberal Democrat Friends of Israel” group ... which it does ... it also has "Liberal Democrat Friends of Palestine" group too..

Both of which, as I explained in my exchange with them, are internal associated groups made up of members and supporters with particular views on the Middle East. Neither means the party is secretly funded by a foreign government.

But again, the facts didn’t really matter.

That’s the bit I struggle with.  If I’m wrong about something, and somebody proves it properly, I’ll usually back down. I’ll probably try to save face first because I’m human ... but eventually facts win.

For some people though, belief seems to become reality. Even when reality itself disagrees.

And I still can’t quite get my head around that.

A Move to Spain

My wife and I never really talked about moving abroad. It never crossed our minds.

Life was here in the UK. Family was here. And now there’s a grandson in the mix too. That should have been enough to keep us rooted... but something suddenly changed.

I guess recent family events have a way of doing that. They changed the way we thought about life. Both my wife and I suddenly realised that life is for living. It has to be fun and enjoyable, and maybe a move abroad could do that for us.

We could stay in Yorkshire, or in the UK at least, and there’s nothing wrong with that. But the reality is our family is already dotted all over the UK. It’s not like we’re all on the same street.

My wife watches a lot of A Place in the Sun, and the life you can have out there, especially in early retirement, looks pretty idyllic.

And if any of our kids turned around tomorrow and said they were off to live abroad, we wouldn’t hesitate to back them.

It was while we were holidaying in Salou, Spain, at the Costa Durada Hotel, in September 2025 that we both suddenly twigged that Spain could actually be our place in the sun. A new home, maybe.

It ticked a lot of boxes for us. A good and cheaper holiday base for the kids and grandchildren, PortAventura World right next door, only around a two-hour flight from the UK, and roughly 7 to 9 hours of sunshine a day for much of the year. In summer, it regularly hits 10 to 12 hours a day. Great.

Within a couple of days, we had drawn up a draft five-year plan. That plan is below, but I've also added for download in my Google Drive.

We went to A Place in the Sun Live in Manchester earlier in 2026. It was good. Useful. Also a bit of a blur. Too many talks, too many options, too many people telling you slightly different things.

We came away with more questions than answers, but probably a little more eager to look into it properly.

The A Place in the Sun guides have been a massive help too. They don’t make the move look effortless, which I actually like. They make it clear that Spain is still possible after Brexit, but there is paperwork, planning, tax, healthcare, visas, and a fair bit of patience involved.

That feels more useful than pretending it is all sun loungers and cheap wine.

Spain stayed on our radar. It’s familiar, it’s proven, and there’s a big expat community, which makes the whole thing feel less like jumping off a cliff.

But at the same time, neither my wife nor I want to just recreate the UK in warmer weather. We want a mix. A bit of familiarity, yes, but also the language, the culture, and the everyday differences. We would like to become more integrated into Spanish life.

The loose idea is simple. Rent first. See how it actually feels when it’s not a holiday. No pressure, no big commitments straight away.

I personally think I’d get bored just sat in a Spanish home watching the sun rise and set every day, so maybe we need something that keeps us busy and generates a small income.

Something flexible. Copywriting makes sense for us. It fits around life rather than the other way round, and we’ve done it before as a small business.

We’re not rushing into this. Five years feels about right for us. Long enough to do it properly, not just react to a feeling. Long enough to get plans, figures, and ideas properly into motion.

What follows is the plan as it stands. It will change over time as we get things sorted.

I have also started putting together a simple downloadable five-year moving plan checklist for anyone else thinking along similar lines. It doesn’t replace proper visa, tax, legal, or property advice, but it gives you a year-by-year framework to scribble on, tick off, and adapt.

Download the generic five-year Spain moving plan checklist

The Shape of the Move

This isn’t planned to be a clean break. Certainly not from the beginning.

We want it to feel like we’re easing ourselves into it.

We’ll rent in Spain first. A couple of months to start with, maybe longer if it feels right. Just to see what everyday life looks like when the novelty wears off a bit.

Back here, the house stays. At least for now.

While we were at A Place in the Sun Live in 2026, we spoke to a wealth manager who pointed out that a house in the UK can still drain cash. Yes, it’s an asset, but we would have to pay someone to manage it for us. We would also have repairs and maintenance to pay for, even though virtually everything is brand new, including the roof, doors, windows, bathroom, and kitchen.

He recommended selling and using the cash to live off.

I must admit, the most appealing part for me is keeping it. But the thought of strangers living in it and not keeping it as I would like does bother me.

All that said and done, right now, we are still thinking about renting it out. Keep it as an asset. Keep a bit of security behind us. If it works, great, it helps fund things in Spain. If it doesn’t, we’ve still got options for returning.

The Plan as it Stands

These are my working notes.

2026 - Property and Budget Groundwork

Mortgage paid off in August ... finally. That still feels good to say.

Where might we move to?

We had looked at Salou a couple of times now. We are actually out here now at the H10 Salou Princess, which is why I decided to write this. We like the area, and there is PortAventura World on the doorstep, airport is handly, lots to see and do, which is useful for when family come to stay. But it is perhaps a little too busy, and if we are being honest, as it's very popular, the prices of property do reflect that.

As of May 2026, minimum of 70sq.m, 2 bed, air con, balcony, parking and the use of a pool, you're looking between £145k - 210k.

In the Province of Murcia the prices tend to be between £85k - £470k, yeah a wider range of prices, but lots available in what appears to be more affordable (granted, we need to see what these properties are like!), so ours next trip will be further south, to take a look at the area around Murcia (between Cartagena and Águilas).

From here, it’s about building a proper buffer. Moving costs add up quickly when you start looking at them properly. Deposits, removals, visas, legal costs, translations, insurance, and a bit of breathing space on top.

We did find out that transporting the dog to Spain could cost us £3,000 alone (apparently she'll neeed her own pallet in the hold).

Passports valid for 10 years checked and OK.

We’ll start clearing out the obvious clutter. Nothing dramatic. Just stop holding onto things we don’t need.

I also want a rough handle on finances. Pensions, savings, and how they behave if we’re living somewhere else. Not deep detail yet, just enough to avoid getting caught out.

And we’ll keep an eye on local rental values. If the house is going to work for us as a rental, it needs to stack up financially.

We also need a proper Spain living budget. Not holiday spending. Normal life spending. Food, utilities, healthcare, travel, insurance, dog costs, car costs, eating out, and the boring things that keep life ticking over.

2027 - Health, Legal, and Reality Checks

This is where it starts to feel a bit more serious.

Healthcare is a big one. We need to understand how it works in Spain, what we need in place, and what it actually costs. Private health insurance will need proper research, especially by age, cover level, exclusions, and any waiting periods.

We also need to understand how healthcare changes at State Pension age, including whether an S1 form applies to us later. That one feels important.

Same with tax. I’d rather ask HMRC early than guess and regret it later. We also need proper advice on Spanish tax residency, especially if we keep the UK house and rent it out.

One thing we are already learning is that becoming tax resident isn't always as simple as spending 183 days in Spain. Where your income comes from, where your assets are, and even where your spouse lives can all play a part. Definitely one for proper advice rather than guesswork.

Visa rules will probably change between now and then, so this is more about staying up to date than locking anything in. The non-lucrative visa looks like one possible route, but the digital nomad visa may also be worth looking at if we keep some kind of remote copywriting income going.

We need to check what each visa allows, what it rules out, what income we need to prove, and whether any work has to come from outside Spain.

We also need to understand Spanish wealth tax and inheritance tax. From what we have seen already, these can vary by region, so where we live may matter more than we first thought.

That feels like proper advice territory, not “read a few blogs and hope for the best” territory.

We’ll also start learning Spanish. Slowly. Probably badly at first. But it’s part of it.

And we’ll spend time in Spain outside of peak season. Not the shiny version. The normal version.

2028 - Line up the Move

This is when it starts to feel closer.

We’ll begin speaking to estate agents in Spain and properly looking at rental options.

At the same time, we’ll get a feel for the cost of moving everything over. Or whether it’s even worth it.

We also need to check the driving licence rules, including whether our UK licences need exchanging and what happens if we become Spanish residents.

We’ll need to make sure money moves easily between the UK and Spain. Income, pensions, rental payments, and any savings. It all needs to work without becoming a monthly headache.

We also need to look into Spanish banking, currency transfer fees, and whether our UK banking apps, pensions, and mobile numbers will still work smoothly once we are spending longer periods abroad.

If we end up buying later, we need to understand NIE numbers, Spanish bank accounts, notaries, lawyers, property taxes, and all the official steps that come with buying or registering properly.

We also need to get important documents organised. Birth certificates, marriage certificates, and anything else likely to be needed for visa or residency applications. Some may need translating and apostilling (legally authenticating an official document so that it is recognised as valid in Spain).

We also need to understand Spanish urbanisations if we look at resort-style areas or managed communities. Community fees, rules, shared maintenance, pools, gardens, and any restrictions around rentals could all make a big difference.

This is also when we need to look properly at removals. Since Brexit, taking belongings into Spain is not as simple as just hiring a van and driving over. We’ll need proper quotes, customs advice, inventories, insurance, and a decision on what is worth taking.

And then there is dog transport. The £3,000 figure sounds high, so we need to compare options. Specialist pet transport may be worth it, but we should also understand what can be done ourselves, what paperwork is needed, and what Hela would cope with best.

And this is where the proper clear-out happens.

Hela needs sorting too. Vaccinations, paperwork, travel requirements. All of it.

2029 - Decision Year

This is the one that probably matters most.

We’ll spend a full month in Spain. Not as visitors, just living. Shopping, cooking, getting bored, dealing with normal life.

That should tell us what we need to know.

We’ll also decide what happens with the house. Rent it, or sell it. Right now it’s roughly £175k value and about £1,000 a month rental, but that’s just a guide and needs checking closer to the time.

If we keep it, we’ll need proper numbers. Letting agent fees, maintenance, insurance, tax, empty periods, and the emotional side of someone else living in our home.

Visa applications start here. Residency. Bank accounts. Documents. Translations. Apostilles. All the paperwork that turns an idea into something real.

This is also where we need to get organised with wills and estate planning. UK assets, Spanish assets, inheritance rules, and what happens if one of us dies first. Not cheerful, but necessary.

2030 - Move Year

If it still feels right... we go.

Move into a rental, or something more permanent if it lines up.

Sort the UK house properly so it’s not something we’re worrying about from a distance.

Then comes the official stuff. TIE, padrón, healthcare registration, local paperwork, banking, insurance, and whatever else we have missed along the way.

One thing the guides repeatedly stress is not leaving the paperwork until later. Registration, residency documents, and local administration seem to start almost as soon as you arrive.

And then just settle.

Find a vet for Hela. Register with a doctor. Work out where we actually like going for a coffee. Find the local shops. Meet people. Keep learning Spanish. Start building something that feels normal.

Where My (Our) Head’s At

It still feels a bit strange writing this down. Some days it feels exciting. Other days it feels like a lot. Sometimes it feels like too much.

The thought of leaving family, the kids, and a grandson is difficult. But like I said earlier, we wouldn’t stop any of our family moving away. They are already in different corners of the UK as it is, and we know they wouldn’t stop us.

But we keep coming back to the same thought. We’ve spent years doing what we should do. Working, paying the mortgage, building something stable, bringing up a family, and doing the right stuff.

And all that has been right.

But this feels like something we want to do.

This isn’t locked in. It’s not a perfect plan, and it doesn’t need to be. I’ll keep adding to this as we go, changing bits when reality gets in the way, or when something better comes along.

At the very least, we’ll still have a decluttered home, some brilliant memories, more trips to Spain under our belts, and hopefully a bit more Spanish than we have now.

How’s it Going?

Progress is slow. Very slow.

It’s currently May 2026, and here we are again in Salou. Possibly our last visit here for now, just to see if we generally like the area and to take a look in estate agents’ windows.

Property here is a little more expernsive that other areas we have looks at, we have decided that our next trip is likely to be down in Murcia (between Cartagena and Águilas). 

Still don’t know the ruddy language.

But we do like the area, so it is still on our shortlist.

Next, we’ll probably look at southern Spain, most likely around the Murcia region.

We also have a cruise lined up for November 2026, which takes in Vigo on Spain’s northwest coast, so our next proper Spanish move trip may have to wait until 2027.

The Young Mans Haircut

I spent some time this weekend at a Turkish barber. I’ve always admired the craftsmanship in these places btw, there is a specific kind of intentional care they bring to the cuts that you rarely find in traditional salons.

​Anyway, toward the end of the cut, the barber paused and asked whether I usually style my hair up in a quiff or down over my forehead. When I told him "up," he smiled and noted that wearing it down would make me look younger.

​Being in my late 50s, the idea of "looking younger" isn't a primary goal of mine, in fact, I think trying too hard to recapture youth often looks a bit daft. However, the comment sparked a bit of digital curiosity. I decided to use AI to generate a version of myself with a younger mans hairstyle just to see the contrast.

​The result? It confirmed my instinct. While the AI could change the hair and smooth the edges, I much prefer the reality. There’s a certain comfort in looking like the age you actually are.

My Original Cut
The Original Cut

AI version 1
AI Version 1

AI Version 2
AI Version 2

AI Version 3
AI Version 3


 



I Do Not Owe My Future Self an Apology

Not sure if you would class this as an epiphany or just an interesting thought.

I’ve just updated my profile on nownownow.com, and one of the questions was something like, “Have I had a recent epiphany?”

For no special reason, the thought struck me that I do not owe my future self an apology for who I am today.

I think the life I have led, and the life I lead today, is a good one. My current level of knowledge is very good, and my current emotional capacity is also strong. My daughters are doing well, I have a beautiful wife, and I’m heading into the near future with retirement (and the freedom that brings) starting to feel real.

If I spend my life trying to become someone my “future self” won’t be ashamed of, I risk living a life that isn’t mine.

Perhaps that is the real epiphany.

I suppose, like could do today with my past self, my future self will look back and realise that every “mistake” or “flaw” I have today was actually a necessary stepping stone.

I don’t owe an apology for being what is effectively a work in progress. That’s just called being alive.